Racism Rears

I had a very interesting situation happen to me today. I just recently started playing an online game, and as I tend to do I was browsing the forums trying to discover tips and get to know the people there. There was a particular thread where folks could post item “wishlists” for the game. One poster was posting their list over and over again, about twice per page. This was annoying some people who made pissy comments. Then someone notified the members that the “spammer” didn’t speak very good English, in fact Spanish was his first language, and then asked if anyone knew Spanish so the etiquette rules could be explained. One gentlemen, we’ll call him GG, said: ……………..donto posto every pago…..???

See what he did there? Funny, right?

No, not at all. There were several people who laughed. I posted that I thought the comment was racist. The backlash was not pretty.

GG: ha ha…..ok….im jewish with a big nose ok????
Me: Then you should know better.
Becks: hey yoou are beautiful…………..nose sizes and culture dont even come into it…..anyway the man in your picture doesnt have a big nose!!!!!!!!!!!
Mary: I’m sure it was meant as a little joke..no racists here…. :thumbs:
GG: we are all good ppl here….just kidding…..calm down…..and i do know better….. *boggled face*
Kerry [in response to Mary]: Exactly! :thumbs:
Me [in response to Mary]: I understand it was meant as a joke. And I’m not saying that GG is a racist. I’m just pointing out that while the intention may have been innocent, it is still racist and perhaps more thought should be given before saying such things in the future.
Mary [in response to Me]: but if we can’t joke with each other here it’s no fun..we’ve “known” each other so long!!..how can anyone here be racist..we gift each other equally no matter where they’re from or who they are!!!
Me: I would say making a joke at the expense of another is no fun, especially when it insults an entire culture.
Scuba [in response to Me]: You guys, let’s just drop this ok? No one was trying to offend anyone, it was just a little play on words, I do it all the time too, and I have lived everywhere, seen tons of cultures, and love them all!! Let’s keep this thread nice and friendly please?
Becks [in response to Me]: the remark wasnt meant to be racist, or a joke on others behalf…….i think you are over analysing the situation,pople on here help others, we all know each other well, no harm was meant….
Mary [in response to Me]: no one was insulted but you..
GG [in response to Me]: ok now im upset…..u dont know me…and u dont know how many items i gave to arebs jews…spanish and americans….so just keep ur ideas for yourself…cause ur trying to look smart…but your not…………..
Mary [in response to Scuba]: exactly…someone needs to make a scene!
Pink [in response to GG]: IGNORE them adn they’ll go away hopefully
Becks [to someone who asked what was going on]: no love, some sad individual that is trying to make something out of nothing to make themselves feel better…………which to me is shallow!!! how are you?
Mary [to the same person as Becks] not at all hun..just someone wanting to cause drama for no reason!! how are you sweety??
GG: thank you the one who ruined my mood……………….im out

Queue bunch of folks begging GG not to go, remarking that ME didn’t know what they were talking about, etc., etc., etc., “You know it wasn’t racist”, ad nauseam.

This whole situation was really unsettling to me. I admit it, I cried. The kneejerk reactions, the patting each other on the back for not being racist while simultaneously insulting me and making passive-aggressive remarks just knocked me right in the stomach. A white male makes a racist comment, gets called out on it, and then is flocked to and fawned over by white females until it’s “all better” and he’s reassured he’s not really a racist. These are likely some of the same women who swear up and down they’re not racist, they’re colorblind, they never say a negative word about anyone. It just angers me, and frustrates me, and hurts me. Especially as a white woman. Can you imagine the backlash if I would have been a Latino person, or some other minority trying to speak out for themselves?

And people say that racism no longer exists. I left the thread without any more comments, unable to stand up and make more of a confrontation. I feel ashamed about that, I wish I would have been stronger in the moment. However, a friend of mine, trying to console me, said:

In other words, this guy (and this community), knows that what he said is racist. But, he didn’t really mean it in a racist or negative way. He was reaching for the cheap laugh. Sometimes…as a crusader, you have to take your lumps. You have to let the vitriol and irrational self-righteousness wash over you. You know, when you stir up someone, they feel like they got spanked, or slapped or something. Smacked down. That’s what he feels now. My suggestion is to drop it. You don’t want to turn into a drama loci. You just want the racism to stop. For people to be aware of the connection between their actions and the state of the modern world. I think you’ve probably done that. This guy won’t, probably, reach for the same cheap laugh again. He’ll be afraid, next time he’s tempted, that someone will call him on it and embarrass him in public like you did. I call that a victory. However, now, you have to let the children call you names, after you put them in the corner. That’s how it works. “Mom” gives the kid a timeout, the kid tells mom that he hates her and she’s ugly and stupid. However, the kid learns his lesson and doesn’t get put into the corner for the same thing again, because he knows if he does it again, he’ll be back in the corner. Effective parenting through superior firepower.

What do you all think?

ETA: As Meowser and Meghan pointed out to me, this isn’t necessarily racism since a native Spanish speaker could be any race. Thank you for that correction ladies. Yes, even I am not perfect and need to adjust my thinking. However, that does not mean that I believe the comments made were discriminatory, just that I put the wrong label on it.

The Atheletic Body

The use of the word “athletic” in relation to body type is quite popular. When this word is used to describe a body the term usually implies the physique that is trim, muscular and tall. Usually the athletic frame is associated with runners or swimmers. However, the word is grossly misused. Now, if we look at the definition of the word athletic we find:

athletic |aθˈletik|
adjective
1 [ attrib. ] of or relating to athletes or athletics : athletic events | an athletic club.
2 physically strong, fit, and active : big, muscular, athletic boys.

Since the first definition points to athletes, I think the definition of that is important as well.

athlete |ˈaθˌlēt|
noun
a person who is proficient in sports and other forms of physical exercise.
• chiefly Brit. a person who is skilled in competitive track and field events (athletics).

It would read that to be considered athletic one should be “physically strong, fit, and active” and be “proficient in sports and other forms of physical exercise”. So it would reason that folks who do well in sports, any sport not just a chosen few, should be considered to have an athletic frame. Taking a gander at Wikipedia’s List of Sports there are categories which surpass this body stereotype. In fact, there are more sports which either do not require a specific body type, or require one that is different from the general idea of “athletic”, than there are ones which adhere to the standard. For instance, female gymnasts need to be very thin, short in stature, have very little in the way of curves, and be extremely muscular. However, shot put athletes need to throw a shot weighting 8.8 pounds (for women) or 16 pounds (for men) as far as possible, thus are usually extremely muscular all over. A similar body type as a body builder, though less girth.

It is both fascinating and disheartening, to me, that the world’s obsession (and by “the world” I mean mainly United States/Canada/UK) with the shape of the human body has become so diluted and misaligned that masses of people who are athletic are refused the title simple because of our connotations with fat and health. Truth be told, being muscular is still classified as being overweight. Let’s think about this. Take a 6′ tall male body builder. His weight is centered around 350 to 400 pounds. If this man was to list his height and weight only, people would immediately jump on the OMG YOU’RE UNHEALTHY AND UGLY AND HORRIBLE!!!!111!!elevenityfuckingone!!!1111 bandwagon. Now, if we add the element of him, then, detailing his body building, he would likely be cut some slack and flaunted over. However, this athlete would not be granted the description he deserves, athletic. After all, he is proficient in his sport, strong, and active.

Our society is so dreadful of the dreaded fat that we would rather strip pride from people than give acceptance and love. People are pressed into boxes with such vigor that anyone that doesn’t fit is outcast. This type of thing is why I’m not surprised when athletes use steroids and drugs to alter their performance. They’re already being stripped of the thing they have devoted their life to. They’re already being forced to fit into this standard. It’s an impossible quest, it’s shaming, and it’s built into our everyday language. It goes beyond just fat or obese, or anorexic skinny. It’s about nearly every person in the entire world, aside from a very select few, being told every single day they are not good enough, they will never be good enough, and they will never be accepted.